Steve DiMeglio, Golf Journalist Extraordinaire
From a USA Today article, Steve DiMeglio:
[Woods has] made more than $1 billion in his career, has two children at home he adores more than anything. So why play on?
Woods adores his children, unlike all those other assholes on Tour who despise their kids. I mean, Jason Day doesn’t even care enough about his wife and kids to bang creepy, diseasy, siliconed porn chicks. Hell no, Jason travels around with his family and is never away from them. Damn, Jason, give them some space; spend a little time with your neighbor’s college coed daughter or a Perkins waitress. Too bad Jason doesn’t adore his kid like good ole Tiger.
BREAKING NEWS! From JoseyWales:
Breaking News! Tiger Woods won’t play Fry’s…or anything else until 2016 because of surgery. Morning Drive ratings soar! Golf Channel discussion boards blow up! Lanny H on suicide watch!
Here’s a link to Woods’s announcement.
A sentence of note:
Tiger Woods, a 14-time major champion and winner of more than 100 events worldwide, announced Friday that he has undergone a second successful microdiscectomy surgery on his back.
A second successful surgery? Are those regular maintenance procedures like oil changes or something?
By the way, I TOLD you guys Woods was grabbing at his back at the Wyndham. Remember how the “real media” tried to cover it up until we made a big deal of it? (Well, that’s how I choose to remember it, anyway.)
I already had Golf Channel on watching the web.com event, so don’t blast me for seeing this Woods coverage, but David Duval — my, how far he has fallen — just said we’ll have to wait to see what effect this has on Woods’s “15th, 16th, 17th, and 18th majors.”
Hey, Tim Finchem, too bad you already showed your hand by granting Woods an exemption into the December Hero event. Had you dragged your feet, you could have held on to a shred of credibility.
1:35 pm Update: This online radio coverage is great. Far fewer distractions than on TV, and plenty of commentary about darn near the complete field.
12:50 pm Update: Free Radio Coverage
The Eternal Season: Everyone jokes about being sick of Rory’s Omega theme song. It just won’t go away. You know something else that won’t go away? The golf season:
- Sept. 27 PGA Tour season ends
- (off week)
- Oct 8-11 Presidents Cup
- Oct 15 New season begins (a season which will cram in the Olympics)
Talk about overdoing it. A 17-day off-season, and the Presidents Cup — which will be hyped as if it’s the Masters — in the middle of that period. Imagine the NFL doing that: Super Bowl; off week; Pro Bowl; opening week for the next season.
Golf Media Speak to English: “Golf is at a good place right now”; “These guys are really fun to watch.” Translastion: “We dumbed down the audience so they think Only Tiger Kardashian Matters, and now his career is over. We planned to milk it for another decade, and he didn’t even get close enough to Jack to sniff his tighty-whiteys. (Don’t like that phrasing? Tough. I learned it from Joe Passov, Golf Magazine: “[Rory] can’t sniff Tiger’s tighty-whities.”)
USA! USA! USA! I saw the start of the Soldheim Cup this morning, and all the fans were dutifully, robotically chanting “USA! USA! USA!” I thought of a couple of things:
- We’ve discussed before how tame today’s “patriotic” sporting events are compared to the Cold War era Olympics, so I won’t repeat. But I will mention the Bobby Fischer-Boris Spassky chess match of 1972, which I was reminded of by a trailer for a new movie I first saw in a theater a couple of weeks ago. (It looks a little overdone, but that’s Hollywood.) Today’s “patriotic” competitions don’t hold 1/1,000,000 of the drama of that chess match. And, for the record, not one member of the audience felt the need to chant “USA! USA! USA!”
- Olympics golf next year will be going up going up against not only all the real Olympics events, but also the final leg of the 2016 elections. If Trump is still in the running, no one will bother to watch gymnastics, much less golf.