Will the Big Cat play next week or not?
3:00 pm Update
In a stunning statement released on his website, Tiger Woods has announced he will not be playing the Arnold Palmer Invitational next week. What was stunning was how Woods was able to use the word “I” twelve times in a five-sentence statement.
2:45 pm Update
Woods not playing. See you next week when we’ll reconvene for an exciting live blog of “Will Tiger Woods Play the San Antonio Open?”
2:30 pm Update
The manager of our Tiger Desk has run to the restroom several times to throw up. I feel sorry for him, but there’s nothing I can do. For his sake, let’s hope Tiger announces he is playing. Only 2-1/2 hours until the deadline.
I think Tiger is playing. He knows that as soon as he announces, the golf media will forget there is even a tournament being played this weekend, so Tiger, always considerate of others, is letting the rabble get as much attention as possible before the golf media has to switch to the Big Story.
2:00 pm Update
Still no word. Three hours to go. Time is standing still. The newsroom here at Lanny H Golf is frantic, no work getting done at all. Someone just brought in a cake shaped like a tiger. Several employees are wearing black slacks with a red shirt.
Still no word. Only 3-1/2 hours until the 5:00 pm EDT deadline. Stick with Lanny H Golf, your source for all things Tiger Woods, to get the full story as soon as it breaks. This is a critical matter as many experts think Woods will not play the Masters if he does not play next week.